Life of a Rower Part 2

So, Life of a Rower is my most read post, probably because to most people rowing is weird (actually it is a bit weird to me too). It's not like football or rugby and is on TV every day, it's a distant sport which is little known about in the 'normal world'. 

For me personally I literally cannot remember a life without rowing and what it felt like NOT to be a rower or to be known as 'the rower'. But I definitely would not have it any other way. Rowing is who I am and is what I do, without it I would definitely be the most boring person ever (I'd also be so fat because I love food too much).

We like to eat 

Now I am coming to the end of my school rowing career I'm so sad. The past two years of rowing especially have been the best years of my life so far. I've met the best people, made friends with people I'd never even meet (Amy) if it wasn't for the power of the internet and the rowing community and I've learnt more about myself every day (wow that was a bit deep sorry!). Don't get me wrong, university is going to be amazing (hopefully) and I'm going to meet even more new people and my rowing will be able to improve so much because I'll be training more and more. But I'm so content in this little bubble of school rowing with the best coaches and crew members that I'm really not ready for this bubble to pop yet.

Admittedly, we're not quite at the end of the season yet, Women's Henley is yet to come as well as other regattas and (hopefully) Home Countries. But with the speed this year has flown by I'm certain the next few weeks will pass by instantly and it makes me so sad.

This season has been a mix of emotions, I won my first single race in September as well as another win in a pair with one of my best friends. Hampton Head was amazing and so surprising to come out with a win in our coxed four which we also won in at Monmouth Winter Head. .Then came Seville Training Camp in April which was amazing and so much fun but again time flew by. Not long after Seville I had a boat names after me. That's right.....AN ENTIRE BOAT. It was a huge honour and complete surprise to have a boat named after me and I'm so thankful for that. But there were also times, such as doing 6x500m on the ergo when my legs were burning, I was close to puking and blacking out when I wondered if it was all worth it. Or when we'd have bad outings in the 8 I'd wonder if some people wanted to win as badly as I did and do (emphasis on wonder, I know everyone was committed!) 

An actual boat named after me!!!

With my (not so)  baby brother

But then came National Schools. The event we'd been training for since September, the 6am wake up calls, blisters, burning legs, exhaustion and fatigue filled days all for two days of racing. I was entered into two events, Championship Girls 8s on Saturday and Championship Girls Coxless fours on Sunday. The time trial and semi final for the 8 both went well but in the final we just didn't deliver, the other boats moved ahead and we didn't go with them which meant we came in 5th. We'd placed 3rd in time trials, third in the semis but when it came to the final we just didn't perform but it did fuel me more for Sunday. My coach often says 'You're only as good as your last race and there was no way I was going to end on that race.

At least the weather was nice....

The next day our time trial didn't go brilliantly and I wasn't filled with a lot of confidence, we were messy and didn't get into the best rhythm but we still qualified and were even given a good lane for our semi final (we must've done something right as we placed 4th!). This then gave us much more confidence and we raced the semi well to get a good lane for the final. This was where the real fight began. We didn't get off to the best start but we stayed calm and didn't panic. This time we did get into a good rhythm and soon we were catching the other crews. For the middle 1km we were in third place and it felt good until the last 500m. The crew next to us pulled back and it was a race to the finish line and unfortunately it was not meant to be. We came 4th by 0.56 seconds. I can hardly put into words how disappointed and distraught we were. I cried and cried and cried (and I definitely should have worn waterproof mascara). The coaches were proud of us, and in hindsight I am too, but in that moment, with other crews cheering around us and showing off their medals the last thing I felt was proud. 

Racing in our time trial, we actually look better than it felt

As we carried the boat back to the trailer we got a lot of strange looks from parents and spectators as I continued to bawl my eyes out in public over what..... a rowing race (come on Charlotte get a grip). But I guess they just did not understand how much rowing means to me/us. When you put so much work into training, missing social events, being constantly tired, pushing yourself to such limits to not get anything to show for it is so unbelievably hard. 

I think this picture sums up my feelings at the finish line 

As we all began to calm down we looked back on the race and our training and in hindsight (oh what a wonderful thing it is) we had done pretty well. Firstly, until that day we'd never raced coxless before which is a big adjustment because coxed and coxless boats are actually very different (coxless boats are very sensitive to every movement you make). We'd also had very few outings coxless as we'd had so many in the 8, we hadn't even been in the four in Seville. To be placed fourth in the country really isn't too shabby. After refuelling with lots of pasta and cake we had some crew pictures and it struck me just how much love and appreciation I have for my crew members. I know each one gave 110% in that final race and I know how upset we all were because we worked so hard but felt we had nothing to show for it. 

The best crew out there

That final race has taught me a lot about myself, how far my body can go when I want something enough, how much rowing means to me, how much harder I'm willing to work to win, how much I love my friends and how lucky I am to be surrounded by so many amazing and lovely people. Racing experience is invaluable in itself and I've learnt a hell of a lot from the past weekend (including wearing sun cream even when it's not that sunny because my body seems to burn ridiculously easy and burnt lips are not what anyone needs in their life). 

I hope by September I am ready to head off to the big wide world of university rowing but until then I'm going to savour every single minute at the boathouse with my favourite people in the world (minus Harry Styles because unfortunately he will not be there).

I hope you enjoyed this post, if you have any questions about rowing please ask me and I'll answer as best as I can!

Thank you so much for reading!

Charlotte 

XO

A little quote from Hannah Maggs' and Stef Michalak's vlog which I really believe in

Questions, Questions, Questions!!

I really enjoy answering these questions so I thought I'd do some more that I found on Twitter. I don't know what it is about these posts that I like so much, perhaps it makes me think a bit more about myself? 

Selfie

From just before Christmas, my teeth look so white! 

Full name

Charlotte Rhianne Gill

Age

17 (less than a week till I'm 18 though!)

Birthday

23rd January 1997

Idols

Helen Glover, Malala Yousafzai, Beyonce, Katherine Grainger

Favourite movie

Grown Ups is my favourite comedy movie and (not being original in any way) The Notebook is possibly favourite rom-com. But overall my top top favourite is Perks of Being a Wallflower. 

Favourite TV Show

24 Hours in A&E, Celebrity Juice, Silent Witness or Russell Howard's Good News

Something you hate about yourself

My massive forehead and my voice

Something you love about yourself

My hair (when it cooperates) and I think I'm a kind, caring person

Best friend

I have close friends too but my best friends are probably Emma, Greenie and Sophie 

Someone you hate

I don't know if I actually hate anyone because hate is quite a strong word but I just really don't like rude people, whether I know them or not, I can't stand rudeness

Favourite song

Jubel by Klingande and Stockholm Syndrome & Little Things by One Direction 

Favourite band

I think it's obvious but One Direction

Say sexy you think of:

Confidence, muscles and a nice, friendly smile (height is quite important too!)

Relationship status

I couldn't be more single if I tried

Ever had bf/gf

Nope (cries whilst consuming copious amounts of chocolate)

My idea of a perfect date

Something simple like a nice dinner and then a movie or just chill out at their house! 

Where I want to be right now

Somewhere warm and sunny with blue sky and blue sea like Florida or the Caribbean

Girl crush

Kendall Jenner

I mean just look at her, it's not fair

Boy crush

Harry Styles and Nick Bateman

Need I say more?

Embarassing memory

There are so many I can't remember. I've probably suppressed them in the back of my memory!

Talents

I guess rowing, I'm a good listener and I hope I'm good at writing? 

Someone I miss

The girls from the Welsh team! 

Someone I love

My friends for always being there

Future goals

Row for GB (who knows if that's actually achievable?!) and to be successful

A confession

This is really tricky! Urm.... I really don't know. I don't really have a lot of secrets/confessions and the ones that I do have are VERY secret and will not be exposed any time soon!   

Something I'm addicted to

Music, it is the one thing (apart from human essentials e.g. Water, oxygen and food) that I can't live without

Fave animal

Dolphins and horses (I can't choose between the two!) 

Favourite TV couple

I had to think really hard about TV shows for this one! I think maybe Miranda and Gary from 'Miranda' because they are so well suited and they are together eventually even though they encounter some major hiccups! Also, Chuck and Blair from Gossip Girl, partly for the same reasons but also because their final relationship is so perfect and he treats her like a princess! 

Ships

Janya (Jim Chapman and Tanya Burr) They literally have my relationship goals!

Favourite quote

I'm a sucker for quotes but some of my favourites are 'You never know what's impossible until you try' or 'Winners never quit, quitters never win' or 'The body achieves what the mind believes' 

Lucky number 

I don't believe in lucky numbers so I don't have one!

Biggest wish

To be happy, loved and successful

Bad habits

Nail biting and procrastinating

Food you hate

MUSHROOMS. I think it's partly their awful squishy texture but they also taste so gross. 

Hair colour

Blonde

Eye colour

Blue

Favourite kind of ice cream

Pretty much anything from Ben and Jerry's or a simple Mint Choc Chip!

Any question you'd like: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

Hopefully either still studying for a masters or working, hopefully in London!

I hope you enjoyed these questions! Feel free to do them yourself, let me know if you do! 

Much Love

Charlotte

XO

Dear Thirty Year Old Me

Dear thirty year old me, 

Well, 17 year old me isn't really sure where to begin....

I feel like I should start from where I am heading soon...university. I don't feel old enough to be going to university, it feels like only last week I was starting secondary school. Anyway, I hope university, wherever you ended up, was amazing. I hope you made the most of it, making new friends, rowing (of course) and gained so much experience from it. Knowing you it took you a while to settle in and feel comfortable in new surroundings with strangers but I'm sure you took it all in your stride. I'm sure there are moments that you'd rather forget ever happened but I know there are hundreds that you'd love to relive.

I don't know what you did after uni, whether you decided to continue studying or you got a job but I hope you enjoyed it. Right now I have no idea what to do after university. I am fully aware of what I enjoy (and what I don't) but I have no clue about exactly what it is that I want to do. Don't worry though, I'm not panicking just yet! I really hope that you are happy in what ever you are doing now, a psychologist,  a rowing coach, a stay-at-home mum, anything. 

I guess I hope you've settled down by now. I know for many people a family isn't a priority but for me it always has been. I really really hope he treats you well whoever he is, I hope he treats you how you deserve and spoils you. Perhaps you even have children by now? I know you'll be a good mum. If you don't, there's no need to worry, everything happens when it is meant to.

One thing I do hope is that you haven't stopped is rowing, Lets be honest, we were never really that good at sport! But finding rowing was possibly the best thing that has happened to us so far, it is one of the things that keeps me going, when school is stressful I'll just sweat it out. I don't blame you if you've reduced the intensity of training but I'm sure you're still keeping active, even if it is because it allows you to eat all the chocolate (you have ALWAYS had a sweet tooth!). 

On the topic of rowing, you must have stayed in contact with some of the rowers at least? They are a second family to me and (so far) they are probably some of the best people I have met. You mustn't have forgotten some of your school friends though, they've been with you through thick and thin. I realise you will have many new friends, but please keep in touch with the old ones! If you haven't do it now. Message them on Facebook, or whatever new social network there is! It is always good to reminisce. 

To say that I love One Direction right now is probably an understatement and as much as I really hope that they're still together, who knows what happens in 13 years? If they are I'm sure you still love them and I'm sure you'll still be getting teased about it to this day! But who cares right? I can only wonder what Harry's hair looks like, or how many new tattoos they all have and what their new music is like! 

I guess the main point of this letter, thirty year old me, is that I hope you're happy. A lot of people have told you to stand up for yourself more because you just accept what people have to say too often. Don't let people get the better of you because YOU are the most important person. If you're not happy I know there are people who surround you, friends and family, who love you dearly. Including me. 

Much Love

Charlotte

XO

*This is a very different post and it took a very long time to write. Please give me some feedback in the comments because I'd love to know what you all think! 

Friends are the family you choose...

I love this quote simply because I believe it's so true. You don't have to be friends with anyone. No one is going to make you be friends with them. You aren't forced to spend hours and hours with the same people if you don't want to. You simply choose to. 

You know you're friends with someone when you send them a Snapchat of yourself with no makeup and 3 extra chins, or when you know exactly what they're thinking with just one look or (as I've found out more recently) when you say or need the exact same thing as them at the same time (ehem Emma). There is nothing quite like having a private joke where you can just look at your friend(s) and say one thing and you all burst into fits of laughter with that one memory. 

Friends are there for everything, the good times and the bad, with advice, help and a big hug to make you feel better. Recently I've been so grateful for my friends. I realise that I'm not the easiest person to be friends with, especially when I'm anxious or in a really bad mood (or if I'm extremely tired and hungry!). But despite this my friends stick by me and I'm so grateful for that (thanks gals). 

I think when you are growing up who you are friends with, and who you aren't, helps to shape who you are and make you the person you become. You realise your likes and dislikes, your pet hates and your favourite things, what makes you laugh, what makes you cry. Friends are there when you aren't sure if an outfit suits you or to help you do your hair or make up. To let you copy their homework if you've forgotten to do it and to back you up in an argument.  To go to One Direction concerts with you and dance until your feet hurt, to go to festivals and listen to music until your ears hurt and to go shopping with until your purse is empty. Ultimately they are there to make the memories that shape your life. 

One Direction!!

One of my oldest friends and I 

I personally think that friends are essential in helping you grow and develop, supporting you through challenges you may not have believed possible to succeed in. I have doubted myself so many times, and I still do, but I've always had someone pushing me to do it and believing in me. This is probably most prominent within the rowing club where everyone helps and supports each other. I've had so many deep conversations with some of the rowers and always walked away feeling supported, it's just so nice knowing people care.

The rowers aka best people ever 

I recently had a self-esteem talk in school and we ended up writing our name on a blank piece of paper which we then passed around the room and people wrote anonymous messages about what they thought of you (all positive of course). I'd done this before but it was within my form group which meant we were all quite close. Doing it in a larger group with people you don't know a lot about seemed to have more of an impact on me. I received lovely messages, most of which I didn't know who they were from which made it special. There were people in the room I'd literally only exchanged a few sentences with in the past year yet they still had lovely things to say about me, and me about them. We all left the class with huge Cheshire cat smiles spreading across our face.

I think what I'm trying to say is don't take your friends for granted because they don't have to be your friend, they want to. Don't be someones friend to use them, be their friend because you want to, because it'll make you happier. I think friends are one of the world's greatest things. 

Much Love

Charlotte

XO

One of my favourite photos ever

Things That Make Me Happy!

So I've had a little idea for my blog, I will be starting 'Things That Make Me Happy Thursday'. For this I will write down things that make me happy on a piece of paper as inspired by Carrie Hope Fletcher to be happy more of the time and enjoy life as it is. I will of course be writing other posts throughout the week!

This week:

What makes you happy?

Much Love

Charlotte

XO