Strong Not Skinny

Probably since I was around 10-11 years old I've been worried about my appearance. I was a goofy, lanky, spotty, greasy-haired young teenager and I hated how I looked. From then on it kind of only got worse and I ended up pretty much hating every part of myself. I was obsessed about being stick thin and for ages I was following loads of 'thinspo' blogs on tumblr because all I wanted was to be as thin as the models and I wasn't which made me so unbelievably self conscious.

While I do still want to be skinny and I still look at my body and get frustrated at things I see, I am a lot happier with my appearance than I have probably ever been. I still see people on tumblr or instagram with the most incredible figures and they're so skinny but still have good boobs and bum and I'm so jealous of them but I know that's probably not the best body shape for me or the shape I am meant to be.

If I want to be a strong athlete I need to have a different body shape to the likes of Kendall Jenner or Karlie Kloss with their tiny waists and skinny legs. I need muscle and a bit of weight on me so I'm stronger and I can produce the most power. So I'm starting to worry less about the size of my waist. I've kind of re-evaluated my life and I've decided it's more important for me to be strong than skinny. I'm trying my hardest to eat well; wholewheat pasta, lots of protein, veg and cutting down on my sugar but it is hard. This week has probably been a bad week, I've snacked a lot which I shouldn't have and I've eaten more sugar than I should've but everyone has bad weeks. I have to keep it all in perspective. Some weeks will be really good, others will be not so good but it's completely about balance. I'm still working out loads, I'm training hard and I'm really pushing myself. 

Aside from that I'm learning to accept that everyone has a different body shape and it is okay. Maybe I'm not meant to be that skinny girl with the 24 inch waist and narrow hips. But that is okay, it's hard to accept when I would love to look like that, but it is okay. Just like it's okay that I currently have a little more fat on me and my bum isn't as Kim K as I would like it to be. The main thing is I'm actually trying to change it. I have a new weights programme, I'm trying my best to eat well and I'm working out to skim off some of the fat. 

Waiting to see the change from the work I'm putting in is one of the hardest things. I do lots of ab exercises but it's taking a while to see a change and it'll take a while to see a difference so patience is definitely key! 

At the end of the day your body is your body and you have every right to be happy with it. It's likely to take some time, maybe even years but don't base your idea of perfect on someone else, just be you

! 

Thanks for Reading

Charlotte

XO

Makeup Revolution Redemption Palette Iconic 3 / Review

It's been months and months since a sole makeup post, probably because I haven't found something I could write a whole post about but this eyeshadow palette is something special. I wish I'd taken pictures of the palette before I used it but I forgot so sorry for the slightly less-than pretty pictures! 

I've been so desperate for any Makeup Revolution products for about 7-8 months since the brand first really blew the makeup world away with the quality but ridiculously low prices. The eyeshadow palettes were the first things I set my eyes on and the main things I really wanted to buy so it only seems fitting that it was the gorgeous Redemption Palette Iconic 3 that I chose! 

This palette has 12 shades ranging from rose-gold tomes to darker brown shimmers and grey tones. I LOVE IT. I pretty much chose it soley for the pink-copper tones, I've got the Urban Decay Naked Palette so I didn't really want any more browny-neutral shades and I felt my makeup collection was lacking pinks and rose-goldy tones. Now it is the first palette I reach for on a daily basis. 

The shades don't seem to have names but I have some definite favourites. The brown shimmer tones are quite deceiving, when I first used them I expected a brown shimmer but they come out with much more pink undertones than I was prepared for but I love them. 

My most used shade is probably the matte pink-brown shade. It's the perfect 'no makeup' makeup look and I tend to wear this to work, on the days when I can be bothered to put on a bit more makeup! The matte shade applied gently to the eyelid adds a little colour but is simple and not OTT for a day at work.

Swatches- which are surprisingly difficult to get right! 

The staying power of the shadows is INCREDIBLE. I wore it for a night out, got home and forgot to take my makeup off (naughty I know but I was tired ok). I woke the next morning, had to rush out to work and didn't have time to take it off and freshen up my makeup but I got home an hour later and I was so surprised to see that the shadows literally had not moved. Not even a tiny millimetre. The highlighting shade was exactly where I left it, the crease shade was still there and the main base shadow hadn't budged. 

The pigmentation is also pretty decent. I actually had to re-do my eye makeup the other day because I under-estimated how pigmented the shade would be. I put a fairly decent amount on my brush, started to apply it to my lids and I was shocked at how pigmented it was! 

One thing I'm not a fan of is the double-ended applicator it comes with. I HATE these things so much as I never found a decent use for one because the application is horrible. But, I used one end when I forgot one of my eyeshadow brushes and had to use it under my eyes and it worked relatively well so it's not all bad! Another slight negative is that some shades, particularly the mattes can be a little crumbly when applying the shadow to your brush. However, if you just pat your brush over it you can collect it up and apply it to your eyes, wasting is not an option. 

I cannot recommend this palette more and I can't wait to buy more Makeup Revolution products in the very near future. Such great products for such a cheap price you really can't go wrong! 

Thanks for Reading

Charlotte

XO

Be Brave

There's a phrase one of my coaches used to say all the time when we were on the ergs which really motivated me. He'd say 'be brave'. He'd tell us push through the pain and believe in yourself and it's something I'm trying to put into my real life.

For about 2-3 years I let anxiety control me, I stayed within my comfort zone and didn't challenge myself. I just wasn't brave. I kind of remained in my shell and didn't venture out of it unless I was with friends I trusted with my life. But since I've been thrown head first into the adult world I'm feeling more confident and I'm learning to be brave and just put myself out there (but not in that way!). 

I basically have no choice but to be confident now, I can't just get my mum to do everything for me, I'm a real life adult now. But being confident and brave is quite a new thing to me but I like it. I don't feel as anxious (there's still some anxiety there) in new situations or meeting new people, I actually feel comfortable doing it. I don't shy away from giving my opinion and speaking up when I have something to say and it's great. 

Being brave takes some courage but it's so worth it for the results. I've never felt more in control of my life and generally happy with the direction it is taking (aside from worrying about UCAS, resitting and reapplying to uni). I think what I mean is in my actual self and who I'm becoming as a person is actually someone I like! 

When it comes to being brave, to quote Nike, just do it. If you think for too long you'll talk yourself out of it so just say yes! You never know you may actually have a good time and meet new people and make friends. Or it may not work out but you'll have learnt from it so it's never a bad thing! Being brave means you take a risk, you risk being judged or wrong or even being hurt but 99% of the time nothing like that will happen and if someone does judge you then that's there problem not yours! If you can just let go and enjoy yourself then that's what really matters.

But being brave doesn't mean you can't worry at all, it's okay to worry and it's not a bad thing but you can't let it hold you back. One thing my trail guide in SA said that's been one of the main things I've kept with me since the trip is 'Don't let fear hold you back'. From experience I also know to not let it hold me back as some of my best memories come from situations I was so nervous about to begin with but once I was there or once I'd done it I had the best time! If you let fear hold you back you'll never really live. You'll stay in your sheltered, safe life which is fine occasionally but it is so important just to live. Spend time with friends. Meet new people. Go new places and don't let anything hold you back. You just have to be B R A V E. 

I found this and like it very much: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/shyness-is-nice/201305/50-ways-you-can-be-brave-today 

Thanks for reading,

Charlotte

XO